Giving Silk to a Man: A Guide to Getting It Right

In short: a gift of silk for a man rarely misses for lack of taste, but for excess of ambition. The pieces that actually get worn are the simplest — a T-shirt, boxer shorts, sleep shorts. Keep the joggers and loungewear for those who have already taken to the fabric. And check just one thing before you order: the size.

I receive this question every year at the same time, and it is always worded the same way: “will he actually wear it?” It is the right question. Among men, silk carries a cumbersome reputation — that of the film-set dressing gown, the robe with a cord belt, the slightly theatrical cliché. The result: we give the most spectacular piece on the shelf, it makes its effect for three seconds when unwrapped, and then it stays folded.

Here is how I go about it, and what I would avoid.

The real risk is not bad taste, it is too much

A silk gift for a man almost always fails for the same reason: it asks the person receiving it to change a habit. A very visible, very shiny, very “silk” piece assumes a gesture he may not make — dressing differently in the evening, embracing a fabric he associates with femininity, or simply having a home where this kind of piece has its place.

By contrast, a piece that slips into what he already does has nothing to prove. He pulls on a T-shirt in the morning. He puts on underwear every day. He sleeps. These three gestures already exist: silk only has to settle into them.

This is the principle I keep for the rest of this guide, and it is also the one I developed in silk for men: where to start.

The three pieces that are beyond debate

The T-shirt, the way in

It is by far the safest gift. A silk T-shirt does not look like a silk gift: it looks like a very beautiful T-shirt. The difference is felt rather than seen — the fabric glides, does not irritate the crook of the elbow, and does not cling to the small of the back at the end of the day.

Two variants worth knowing. Blends (silk combined with cotton, or around 70% silk) hold their shape better, crease less, and forgive hurried washes: these are the ones I recommend for a first gift. 100% mulberry silk gives an incomparable feel and drape, but it requires a minimum of care — so a recipient who is willing to read a care label.

Boxer shorts and boxer briefs, the gift no one dares to give

It is the most useful gift and the least often given, out of modesty. Yet it is also the one that makes the most difference day to day, because silk does exactly what is asked of it here: it does not trap heat, it does not chafe, it stays in place.

A useful point: there are boxer shorts, which are looser, and boxer briefs, which are more fitted. It is better to know which he wears before choosing — it is a question of comfort, not style.

Sleep shorts, for anyone who sleeps badly in summer and winter alike

A pair of silk sleep shorts is a far more relevant gift than a full pyjama set, and far less intimidating. Most men who sleep warm already sleep in shorts and a T-shirt: you replace one piece, not a habit. On what the fabric of nightwear really changes, I went through the mechanisms in men's silk pyjamas: what science knows about the fabric we sleep in.

What to keep for later

Silk joggers, loose loungewear, complete sets: these are very beautiful pieces, and poor first gifts. They are for someone who already knows the fabric, who knows how to wash it, and who wants to spend more than a T-shirt’s worth of time in it. Give them as a second or third gift, never as an introduction.

The same logic applies to colours. A man who has never worn silk will more readily wear it in charcoal grey, deep blue, ecru or black than in a light, lustrous shade.

Which momme to choose

Momme measures the density of silk. The higher it is, the heavier, more opaque and more durable the fabric — and the more it costs. For a man’s garment, the useful setting comes down to three lines.

Momme	The result	Best for
16 momme	Fluid, light, drapes well	Shorts and nightwear
19 momme	The right balance of hold and softness	T-shirt, underwear
22 momme and above	Dense, opaque, very hard-wearing	Loungewear, intensive everyday use

If this vocabulary is new to you, our momme guide explains the unit in detail. For a gift, simply remember this: below 16, it is too fragile for a garment; above 22, it is an investment best left for him to make himself.

Size: the only essential check

This is where most silk gifts go astray. Three habits are enough:

• Look at a piece he already wears. A T-shirt he wears often will tell you his real size, not the one he claims.
• If in doubt, choose the larger size for tops: silk drapes better slightly loose, and a piece that is a little big can be worn, whereas one that is too tight cannot.
• For underwear, do not guess. It is the only category where approximation is unforgiving — if you are not sure, choose a T-shirt.

Three missteps to avoid

1. Giving the most visible piece. The more showy the garment, the more likely it is to stay folded. The “wow” effect on opening and actual wear are two different things.
2. Choosing for yourself. The colour you like is not necessarily the one he wears. Look at his wardrobe, not yours.
3. Forgetting to say how to care for it. A note slipped in — cold wash, by hand or on a delicate cycle, dry flat, never in a tumble dryer — spares him an unpleasant surprise at the first wash. It is a gesture of giving, not a constraint.

By budget

Budget	What I would choose
Under €80	Silk boxer shorts, or a loose-cut T-shirt
€80 to €120	A silk-blend T-shirt, or sleep shorts — the best balance between impact and use
Over €120	A 100% mulberry silk long-sleeved T-shirt, or boxer briefs, for someone who already knows the fabric

Prices change: the Men’s collection shows the current state.

Frequently asked questions

Does a man really wear silk every day?

Yes, provided the piece does not stand out as such. T-shirts and underwear fit effortlessly into a classic wardrobe. Loungewear, on the other hand, requires genuine desire.

100% silk or a blend for a first gift?

A blend, without hesitation. It creases less, copes better with an approximate wash, and costs less — three valuable qualities when giving to someone discovering the fabric.

Should I give a full pyjama set?

Rarely. A set assumes he will change his whole way of sleeping. Sleep shorts or a T-shirt replace a single piece, and are far more often adopted.

How do I care for a silk piece I have been given?

Cold wash, by hand or on a delicate cycle with a mild soap and no fabric softener, then dry flat in the shade. No tumble dryer, no bleach. Nothing complicated, but nothing improvised.

Which size should I choose if I don’t know it?

Measure, or look at a garment he often wears. Failing that, choose a top rather than underwear, and go for the larger size.

To begin

If you remember only one thing: choose the most discreet piece on your list, not the most impressive. It is the one he will wear. The Men’s collection brings together the pieces I discuss here, from T-shirts to underwear and nightwear.

— Malik, for the StudioSoie Journal